Island Webmaster
Post by ♥~Mel Diffy~♥ on Feb 8, 2005 16:13:22 GMT -5
hello. I am suffering from seven rare and deadly diseases, including the disease in which your skin turns red and peels when in the sun too long, poor scores on final exams, fear of being mauled by squirrels, a hemorrhage in my head, smelly feet, an unnatural fear of sterling silver eggplants, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, that that poor 6-year-old girl in Arkansas with a potato growing out of her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to the traveling freak show for 12 chickens and an outhouse. Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you and everyone you send "his" email to $1000? Ooooh, lookyhere! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll meet the guy/girl/it of my dreams tomorrow! How silly!
Maybe the evil letter leprechauns will come into my house and write "I'm a moron" on my forehead in permanent marker in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by a knight of the round table and was brought to this country by pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the year 2010, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant silliness thought up from shear, intense, boundless, senseless, worthless, meaningless, mindless, helpless boredom. If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 87.6 times. Think about what you're contributing to by sending out these forwards.
THE FIVE BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
Chain Letter Type 1:
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> Make a wish!!!
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> No, really, go on and make one!!!
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> Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!!
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> Wish something else!!!
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> No, I'm sorry, we're broke at the time being!!!
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>Try again please.
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>We're out of ponies, sorry!!!
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Have you forgotten why you're scrolling yet?
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STOP!!!!!
Wasn't that fun? ;D Hope you made a great wish!
Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if you don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will be kidnapped by ninja elves, kicked in the head, strapped to a brick, and thrown off a high building into a pile of manure, picked up, have your skin sandpapered off, thrown into a pool of lemon juice, disemboweled through the ear, dropped off a 10 foot ladder repeatedly, tied to a Boeing 747 and flown into the tallest building in Afghanistan. It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake ones, THIS one is TRUE!!! Really!!! Here's how it goes:
*Send this to 1 person: One person will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
*Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
*Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot against your life.
*Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will napalm your house.
*Send this to 20- 5790.4 people: 20-5790.4 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will all simultaneously break into your house, steal all the silverware and china, beat all of it against your head, grab you by the ears, and hurl you past the moon.
Thanks!!! ;D Good Luck!!!
Maybe the evil letter leprechauns will come into my house and write "I'm a moron" on my forehead in permanent marker in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by a knight of the round table and was brought to this country by pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the year 2010, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant silliness thought up from shear, intense, boundless, senseless, worthless, meaningless, mindless, helpless boredom. If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 87.6 times. Think about what you're contributing to by sending out these forwards.
THE FIVE BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
Chain Letter Type 1:
>
> (scroll down)
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
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> Make a wish!!!
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> No, really, go on and make one!!!
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> Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!!
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> Wish something else!!!
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> No, I'm sorry, we're broke at the time being!!!
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>Try again please.
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>We're out of ponies, sorry!!!
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Have you forgotten why you're scrolling yet?
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STOP!!!!!
Wasn't that fun? ;D Hope you made a great wish!
Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if you don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will be kidnapped by ninja elves, kicked in the head, strapped to a brick, and thrown off a high building into a pile of manure, picked up, have your skin sandpapered off, thrown into a pool of lemon juice, disemboweled through the ear, dropped off a 10 foot ladder repeatedly, tied to a Boeing 747 and flown into the tallest building in Afghanistan. It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake ones, THIS one is TRUE!!! Really!!! Here's how it goes:*Send this to 1 person: One person will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
*Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter.
*Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot against your life.
*Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will napalm your house.
*Send this to 20- 5790.4 people: 20-5790.4 people will be annoyed with you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will all simultaneously break into your house, steal all the silverware and china, beat all of it against your head, grab you by the ears, and hurl you past the moon.
Thanks!!! ;D Good Luck!!!
